Friday, March 9, 2012


First googled image for Mass Effect 3
Who else is psyched for the release of 'Mass Effect 3'? Glad you could be here. I've been with Bioware since 'Baldur's Gate' back in the 90s & 'Knights of the Old Republic' in the early 2000s, and they haven't disappointed me yet when it comes to their RPGs. Ever populated with fantastically colorful character (MINSC & BOO for anyone who knows what I'm talking about), intricate storylines, tons of sidequests, many exotic locals, and a generally fun experience (if you can escape the labeling associated with the FPS player's frothing, gibbering daily life and enjoy a game with an alien relic from a bygone time of books and the theatre, something called 'plot')

Modern-gaming alien concepts 101: PLOT
Call me bitter and cynical (cause I am), being a dusty old tome myself, a bibliophile worshiping at the alter of Tolkien, Asimov, and the other literary greats, but I make no concessions in this. Video game writing, generally, is bile. 

Now that I've cleared that up by drawing a line in the sand as definitive as the  San Andreas Fault line, we can move on to Mass Effect 3, the much anticipated climax to the Mass Effect trilogy and conclusion to the story of Commander Shepherd and his mission to save the galaxy from the threat of the Reapers.

Screenshot from the debut trailer of Shepherd in combat.
Thus far, 2 days post release (originally this blog was supposed to go up on the 5th, just in time to beat the release so I didn't have to cover my ass for not being able to afford to actually play the damn game), the game has received glowing reviews and we all know how accurate game critics opinions are.

But all in all it seems solid. Friends have told me that they're holding off playing #3 until they've successfully completed Mass Effect 2 for the simple reason that over 1000 variables will be drawn from gameplay experiences from the first two games in order to maintain continuity between games. Poor bastard ... lucky mother f--

ANYWHO! All of this is ultimately immaterial. The one friend who has actually touched Mass Effect 3 called it a travesty, and pretending to be nice to game that my excitement for deflated like an unpinched balloon is painful. I am really conflicted about my opinion of this game, to say the least.

Clint Mansell's Soundtrack is good ....

The control system has been bastardized to cater to the baboons of the console crowd, forsaking PC players. The Reapers, so wonderfully hyped up in earlier games are for the most part a letdown. The story, just too big.

The Reapers attack London.
Okay, from that point, there's still a lot I'm excited for. I enjoy the attention to continuity, if it doesn't interfere with them telling a good story. I'm willing to forgive a lot of little details when the over-arcing broad strokes wow me, but when the larger story arcs (Oblivion and Skyrim come to mind) and are only supported by a multitude of finer points, no matter how fine, it's still a really shitty mansion built on a foundation of the worlds greatest toothpicks.

I'm also intrigued by the canonization of the affectionately named Femshep, (voiced by the Bioware go-to girl Jennifer Hale), and the 'official look' for the character, which I think is a necessary addition to a roleplaying game with multiple endings and customization characters.

And Femshep is a ginger.
That is, of course, not taking into account the extreme lengths the game developers have gone to to ensure continuing continuity between games, and that only reason anyone would ever possibly need a canon story is to ensure that continuity between games remains the same across the board, I feel like there is something inherently wrong here, but perhaps I'm just nitpicking at this point.

Femshep trailer

So, Mass Effect 3 is out. It looks shiny. Sure it's awesome. Stopped caring. So ...

"Bingle bongle dingle dangle, yickedy doo, yickedy dah. Ping pong, lippy-tappy-too-tah." ~ David Tennant

No comments:

Post a Comment